If you’re familiar with a little tv show called The Big bang Theory you might also be familiar with one of its characters, a shy man by the name of Raj. Raj is a chronically shy Indian who can’t even talk around women unless he loosens his tongue a bit with some alcohol. The funny thing is that if Raj hits the sauce a bit hard he becomes quite the ladies man.

Funnier Still is that there are dozens of people out there who have the same problem. Some are just shy, others don’t know when to shut up, the point is that with a little training and a few Art of Charm dating tips they can turn into true ladies men. Because being shy can be an actual advantage in a dating game that’s full of over-the-top, talkative creeps.

First and foremost, understand that being a silent, overanalysing type can be a huge asset even if your silence stems from being incredibly shy and your deep thought gaze comes from overthinking instead of doing. You know who else is silent and brooding and looks like he has a lot going on inside his head? Ryan Gosling. Emulating somebody like him, or the likes of Cary Grant in his prime if you’re down with the whole ‘retro’ thing can be a great way to stand out and make women notice you. Instead of being the guy who talks too much and tries to woo through poor compliments you’re the silent guy who smiles and talks very little but clearly has something going on. Channel your shyness into an air of mystery and you’ll have ladies swooning over you in no time.

Second, try to adjust your body language to impress. Use all of your body at all times. Think of your posture at all time as if you’re teaching a dance class: put your shoulders back, and stand taller and think about projecting an aura of confidence. Make eye contact and smile a lot but don’t stumble into creepy territory. A silent, confident man appears mysterious to women and if there’s anything they want to do is to unravel that mystery.

Perhaps the most important thing in order to be successful with women is to feel successful. Get yourself in the right frame of mind and there is no limit to what you can achieve. More than just self-help bull, this type of approach actually works quite well as long as you believe in yourself and in your ability to impress those around you. Dressing well can do wonders in this case as you’re no longer fixated on yourself but rather on your attire instead and you can be more natural around women.

Anything is possible if you just set yourself into the right frame of mind and learn to take your perceived flaws and turn them into assets. A good smile, a friendly gaze and well-tailored suit backed by some basic dating tips can turn any quiet guy into a mysterious and irresistible stranger that women will fawn over.